Japanese Cultural-isms
Author: Ockshun Jockson
I've been meaning to write down a list of all the little cultural oddities (well, for Americans that is) I noticed while in Japan. Here's a few:
Taxi Cabs
The taxis in Tokyo and the other two major cities I visited were spotless. I mean super clean. The drivers themselves whear white gloves and a full uniform, and are very proud to be driving the cab. This level of pride was evident with every municipal job I noticed in Japan: the Japanese people take pride in their work and it's quite obvious their job is their shit and means a lot to them.
Tipping
Because Japanese take so much pride in their work, tipping is looked upon as an insult! That's right, if you try to tip for anything they will sling it back at you. Not only will they refuse but you may even offend them offering in the first place.
Don't Touch Those Doors!
Every taxi in Japan's major cities have doors that automatically open and close. I fucked up one time trying to manually close it, and got yelled at by the driver. lol. Don't touch the cab doors! They will open and close for you.
Japanese Girls
If you come to Japan thinking you're a big, bad American mack daddy and gonna pimp on some skinz, think again. Japanese girls are generally shy. But they're extremely hesitant to even attempt to speak Engligh because they do not want to look dumb. So you may meet a Japanese girl that speaks a little English (it's taught in all the schools as a 2nd language) but to get her to attempt to speak it and risk looking "foolish" will be much harder than getting in those panties.
Check, Please
Hold your hand out in front of you, and cross your middle finger over your index finger, and fold all your remaining fingers down. These two fingers in this crossed position is the symbol for, "Check, please" in Japan. I read it somewhere and was like, "Yo baby, watch this" to my girlfriend and threw the sign up in the air. Sure enough, I received an acknowledging head nod from the waiter.
Come Pay, Muhfucka
You may think you're fly with your "Check, please" gang sign but that doesn't mean the waiter's going to bring you the check. In fact, he'll be waiting for your ass at the register because they don't bring checks to you. Nope, you need to go get your check and pay for that shit. So be sure only to cross the fingers when you're absolutely ready to go, otherwise your waiter will be waiting for you at the register for hours.
The Money Dish
Speaking of paying for things in Japan, everywhere you go you will be presented with a rectangular dish when you are ready to pay for something. Even in the taxi cabs, this is true. The dish is intened for you to place your cash or credit card on, followed by a receiving bow from the recipient. What's interesting is the dish is always presented to you with two hands, as if it is a most honorable thing to receive your patronage. So it's: 2 hands on dish, present dish with bow, you place money on dish, another bow and an "arigato arimasu" (thank you very much).
Arigato Arimasu
This means "thank you very much". You'll hear it everywhere you go. You'll also pick up saying it all the time if you have any hopes of blending in. And you'll be bowing a lot. A lot. Other key words:
Hai - Yes. You'll be saying this a lot.
Sumimasen - Excuse me, also used for "sorry" when you are speaking to older people
Ohayo Gazaimasu - Good morning
Konichiwa - Good afternoon
Kombanwa - Good Evening
Oishii des - What a great meal! (Say this to impress your cook, they love it)
You could get around Tokyo on these few words alone, along with a lot of pointing to order your food from menus with images.
Ordering Food
The joke is when we arrived in Tokyo our first nite, we were so cultured shocked we entered a traditional Japanese den/bar with some old Japanese heads cold-chilling in there. We got the stare-dwon and stumbled over to a table. The patron comes over to us and goes, "Hai!" Confused (and American) we reply, "Hi!"...This happened two or three times: "Hai!", "Hi!". When we figured out we were in Japan and Hai means "yes" we left in great defeat. It was very embarrassing. Unfortunately, ordering food in Japan is extremely, extremely difficult. We ended up going to McDonald's a few times on some pure survival shit. We generally looked for restaurants with pictures on their menu which we could point to.
Vending Machines
Vending machines are EVERYWHERE in Japan...I used to see them littered around in my videogames, but just thought they were repeating bitmaps or something. No, they are literally on every corner. Beer, cigarettes, food, coffee, toys. It's crazy. One nice thing they have is outside of some restaurants you order your food through a vending machine and go inside and put your ticket stub on the counter and they bring you the food you ordered outside. This is true with a lot of curry and noodle houses. This was essential for our non-Japanese speaking asses: we could just order by picture, no fuss. And the food is generally good and cheap.
Male Purses and Handbags
OK, this is just a trend, but all the dudes were rocking purses. Like, straight up women's purses. Even our friend that we met, it was irresistible to laugh when walking behind him. Also, all the guys have anime haircuts. Seriously, they all looked like this. In Tokyo, you'd be hard-pressed not to see some Little Bo Peep sheep herding girls. It's crazy.
Clean
I can honestly say the first thing I noticed about Japan was how clean it was. I stepped out of the airport to smoke a cigarette, and when it came time to ash my butt I looked at the ground and was SHOCKED I couldnt find a bit of trash anywhere...ANYWHERE. I was then faced with a dilemma: what do I do with my cigarette butt?? Japan has designated smoke stations every few corners. You'll see people huddled and that's where you're allowed to smoke. People smoke while walking, but it's rare to see. It's really the cleanest city I've ever been to. It's rude to eat something while walking down the street as well.
Convenience Stores
Lawsons, 7-11 and AM/PM *RUN* shit in Tokyo. These three stores are so ubiquitous. They're also your essential "power-up" stations. They have all kinds of crappy food for you when you're about to peel-over and collapse because you can't speak a lick of Japanese and therefor haven't eaten all day.
You Get the "X"
This shit had us rolling: if you want to articulate you do not particularly want something, or to simply say "No" you make an "X" symbol with your arms by crossing them over. I would be in McDonalds ordering something and if they would point to "Super size?" I would give them The X. It's a common thing, it's hilarious.
Women-only Train Cars
Don't get caught out there: If you're waiting for the train and notice some pink iconography printed on the floor, and there's nothing but women around you, you're standing in the women-only designated part of the train. Apparently Japanese businessmen are prone to copping a feel once and awhile on the crowded trains. And if you even attempt to hop on the woman cart, they WILL beat you down (the women, that is).
Well, there is plenty more to say but I have to cut this one there for now. I been meaning to get this list down for some time. Thanks for reading.
Wow, what a great "review"! A very good friend of mine is Japanese, but moved to the US as a teen, and only visits once a year… Being sort of between 2 worlds, he often tells me crazy stories like this. Keep 'em coming!
Cool post.
I've always wanted to visit Japan.
With those tips I should at least be
able to keep fed and watered.
I think Micky D's should get the
"X" any way. Hahaha.
Your initial restaurant story reminds me
of one of the few times I got really panicked
in Austria at a Supermarket when my
Debit Visa didn't work in the Credit Card
swipe machine. The cashier didn't speak any
english, which is very rare...
I speak a little german, but for some reason
not enough to make any sense in this
situation. The store was closing and I had
a line of ppl behind me. I was sweating it.
Fortunately someone behind me, somewhere,
spoke the Anglisch.
That sort of thing throws you off and makes
you realize how insulated a culture we are.
super rad stories. more! more!
businesmen copping a feel on the train! lol.
oh hey... did you see anyone peeing their pants? i hear that it is really not that taboo over there... also, there are game shows about it.
i'm doin it right now...
is it a fauxpaus?
Wait... are you peeing your pants or copping a feel?
peeing and then copping,
of course (!)...
mr. silly doo-doo-head-man
I think you have that in the wrong order.
PS to OJ: Silliness aside, vielen dank for the list -- the kind of little insights on subtle cultural weirdnesses that most travel resources don't necessarily make clear to the Uninitiated.